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You all asked me not to. I put it off for ages, ignoring the way things were gathering dust. I pretended it didn't matter because I told myself no one was looking. I tried not to do it, but I just couldn't see any other way.

I deleted this blog. Sorry 'bout that.

Yeah, for about three days, there was no Fishnet Burnns. But you...you clearly crazy people just wouldn't stop visiting this musty old thing. I always figured the traffic would die down one day and I could let FB die a natural death. Put it out to pasture. Give it the Old Yeller treatment. Just a quiet death rattle that would send it the once-beloved but now obsolete way of things like the drive-in movie theater and the mixtape cassette.

But oh, no! Nary a post for years and years and thousands of you diseased flat-track freaks are still showing up every month and you just won't go away. I get it, I get it...you kids still like the roller derby. I still like it too. And I still like that smell of sweaty pads and burnt nylon and the shrill chirp of Fox 40s and having wheels on my feet.

Here's the thing though. I just can't write about it like I used to. What I can do though, is build websites and make cool internetz stuff. After all, I quit derby to go back to school, among other things.

Speaking of which, this thing is broken crap right now. You guys deserve better and I can make it better. I put the smack down on the spam around here for starters and I'd like to get things remodeled, as it were. But I really cannot do it on my own.

So I'll make all you fellow misfits a deal: You write. I'll make it work and get it into the hands of as many derby people as we can muster. 

Here's what I'm asking you to do:

Send your article submissions to reizerburnn@gmail.com. If you can write something that would help others out there in Derbyland, do it. Something short, something clear and something good. And let's have some personality in it, please! Just get it in.

Ask your coach or your captain or your favorite ref or your derby wife or whoever you've got to do the same.

What's needed most are updates to these articles:

Newest version of WFTDA rules

How To Never Get Busted Back Blocking

How To Never Get Caught Cutting The Track

The New Derby Skater's Ultimate Guide to Gear Pt. 1

The New Derby Skater's Ultimate Guide to Gear Pt. 2

If you feel like you can take on writing an updated version of one of these pillar posts, send me two or three sample paragraphs!

What Now?

Got comments? Hit me. You want to raise Fishnet Burnns from the dead? Let's get some necromancy going like it's D&D night.